I Want To Turn In My Membership Card to the Human Race...

My girlfriend of seven years told me earlier this afternoon that she hated me and never wanted to see me again. After getting that phone call, I went to her apartment to ask if she really meant it. She told me that she's been angry with me for the longest time, and I wanted to ask why, but I didn't--probably because I didn't want to hear the answers, or maybe because I would agree with them.

I couldn't muster up the courage to say anything further. I just stood there and watched as she laid down and eventually fell asleep. I wanted to leave, but I was rooted to the carpet, too numb to move. And if I wasn't confused enough already, when she woke up she asked me to go back with her to her folks place and have dinner. I couldn't accept the invitation.

Anywho, to make a long story short, I spent this evening grousing into my ice water while a good friend listened. It's a good thing too, he helped me put a lot into perspective. Now I just need to focus on the task at hand.

One Week Till Fight Night

Saturday is the day. I've trained hard. Lost thirty pounds of fat and am ready to step into the ring for the first time. I want to win, but even if I don't, I know that all the work I've put into this endeavor is worth it, both physically, mentally, and spiritually.

Nightmares

I've had the same one for the past three days now. Well, maybe not the same one, but the theme is hideously consistent. Maybe all those ultra conservative right wing censor nuts have a point when it comes to violent video games and movies? I don't consider myself a very violent person, but the wholesale slaughter of women and children is not something I want to see when my head hits the pillow.

Maybe I should stick to sports games from now on.